Is the Handshake Dead?

During the first months of the pandemic on the rare occasion that I met someone new in person, it felt weird to not shake their hand. Without the ritual, the handshaking, the introduction felt awkward and almost perfunctory. Let me see the handshake. It means something. But what can mean even more is the absence of it. Welcome to episode 41, where I dig into the history of the handshake. And whether or not, it will make a comeback post pandemic. This episode is sponsored by Nickerson, a full service branding, marketing, and PR and communications agency with team members in Boston. Miami la and new york city Come with me. And I'll take you on a little journey through the history of the handshake, the origins of the hand, shader, not exactly known, but he's generally agreed upon that. We humans have been using it in one way or another for thousands of years. The popular and accepted theory is that it was first used by Knights as a way of displaying peaceful intentions. You see? And extended empty right hand could not possibly be holding a dagger. Or any other instrument of death? It is thought that the shake the up and down movement of the greeting. Evolved as a way to dislodge any weapons that might have been tucked up one sleeve. One of the earliest visual depictions of a handshake is found in a ninth century, BC relief showing the Assyrian king Shellman S here, the third shaking hands with the Babylonian ruler, therefore sealing and Alliance between the two. Homer the Greek writer thought to have been born around seven 25. BC writes about handshakes in his works, his epic poem, the Iliad, which is the story of the Trojan war and the war hero Achilles. And his other epic poem, the Odyssey, which tells of the return journey of Odysseus to the island of Ithaca from the war at Tori. In both of those works, Homer describes handshakes several times. Most often in relation to pledges and displays of trust. So up until about the 17th century, the meaning and use of the handshake was more of a political one. It was a way of sealing a deal. Moving on from ancient Greek and into the 18th century, a number of historians believe that the handshake, as we know it today, Was popularized by the Quakers an opinion piece in the Washington post states that the Quakers in their 18th century heyday were strict egalitarians and thus rejected the established gestures of deference, such as removing one's hat and bearing the head as a gesture of greeting. Honoring equality, addressing each other as friends. They adopted the formal gesture of clasping hands as their greeting gesture. The handshake then spread from the Quakers to other groups. As a popular way to greet equals or friends. In the 19th century, the gesture spread to France and then on to Russia. Soon the greeting became commonplace and by the 18 hundreds, etiquette manuals had begun to include guidelines for the proper handshaking technique. I'll get into more of that later. A national geographic article titled why do we touch strangers so much delves a little into the history of the cheek kiss as a greeting stating. The kiss as a greeting has a similarly rich history as the handshake, it was incorporated into early Christianity and used in religious ceremonies. In the middle ages, a kiss was used as a sign of fidelity. And to seal agreements like property transfers. Today I swift kiss on the cheek known in French as lobby say is a standard greening in much of the world. The word may have originated with the Romans, what a different term for each type of kiss and called the polite version Bassam. I'd like to know what the, uh, impolite versions are. In Paris. Two kisses is common in Provence expect three and four is the norm in the Lamar valley, which kind of seems a little much to me. The cheek kiss is also common in countries like Egypt, Latin America, and the Philippines where three kisses is customary. If cheek kissing is going to make a comeback, I can pretty much guarantee that the handshake is gonna make a comeback too. So in order for you to prepare for when that happens, I'm giving you my four rules of a great and shake and the four handshakes that you are never, never, ever, ever allowed to give. Are you ready? A great handshake will be these four things. One. From two dry, three solid and four, no more than three seconds. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy, right. Wrong. You can't imagine how many people fuck up the handshake. In order to make sure that that doesn't happen to you here are the four types of handshakes that you're absolutely never under any circumstances allowed to offer someone. One. The dead fish. Nothing says I don't put any effort into anything more than a limp handshake. No one likes anything limp. If you know what I mean. If you could not muster the energy to give a proper firm handshake, I'm pretty sure you can't muster the energy in business either. There is simply no excuse for this type of handshake. Two. The sweaty Palm. Yeah. Sometimes you're nervous and networking or meeting situations, but this does not give you the excuse to make someone else feel uncomfortable because you've wrapped your moist clammy poem around theirs. People will absolutely remember that you made them feel lucky. So if you're prone to sweaty hands, Yep. Use, keep a tissue in your pocket. Or if you're at a networking event, keep a cocktail napkin in your hand to absorb any sweat. And shift that napkin to your other hand, just before shaking hands. There's always cocktail napkins at networking events. It won't seem weird that you have one in your hand. Three. The wrestler. Firm does not mean WWF SmackDown. For means putting effort into the handshake Not that you want to challenge the other person on the mat or in a cage fight. So be conscious of how you shake hands. And aggressive handshake is just that. Aggressive. And there's no place for that kind of attitude and networking. And the fourth. The claw, which I also call the queen. You are never under any circumstances. To only offer the tips of your fingers in a handshake, unless you were actually the fucking queen. This type of handshake is downright disrespectful. You give them your whole hand. So now you're all set to take on the world when the world starts shaking hands again. And it will shake hands again. It's just too ingrained in how we greet each other and too important for how we conduct business. In the past, uh, snubbed handshake has had major consequences in 2016 and Egyptian Olympian was kicked out of the Rio Olympics for refusing to shake the hand of an Israeli competitor. In 2018, a Muslim woman who refused a handshake was denied french citizenship. And Mexican drug Lord El Chapo ordered a man killed after he snubbed his handshake. The handshake has been part of our lives for millennia and yes. Over the past year and a half, it has been replaced by alternatives. Like the fist bump, the elbow bump, the Wu hand foot tap and the Nama stay bow, but it's only a temporary hiatus. I am super excited to share the drink of the week with you. I wanted to pick something that went with the theme of hands. So I decided to choose two hands wines out of Australia. Now the only wine of errors that I have is the angels share Shiraz. And I love it. So little history lesson here in case you don't know what the term angel share means, which I actually didn't until I started traveling for wine years back, Angel's share refers to the small amount of wine that are Rates from the Oak barrels while the wine is maturing. Medieval winemakers assumed that angels watched over their wines and that they took their share while they did. So isn't that a sweet, but bunch of tipsy angels flying all over the boys bumping into each other half shit faced. Okay. This wine is a hundred percent Shiraz. It's deep, purple and jammy, but also has sink your teeth into them tannins, which is fun. If you like tannins. It's ABV or alcohol by volume. We know that is 14.2. So it can by chin ass, if you have too much of it, but you get to decide how much is too much. All right, fam thank you for being here. Did you enjoy our little history lesson of the handshake? Are you ready to start shaking hands again? I am I'm ready for handshakes and hugs and kisses and all the other pre pandemic stuff that I have been missing so much. Just another friendly reminder to please subscribe to the podcast, review it. If you like it, share it with your friends, if you like it. And if you think they will like it, if you want more, Julie Brown, check out my website, Julie Brown, bd.com. Or follow me on Insta. At Julie Brown underscore BD or buy my book, they shit works on Amazon or Barnes and noble, or just check back here every Wednesday. I'll be waiting for you. Cheers.