How the People You Meet Will Change Your Life

There was a book of poems by Annalee Skillman titled everyone I love is a stranger to someone. And I love this sentence for so many reasons, not the least of which is that most of the people who are important to us in our lives when we love. For once a stranger to us as well. Welcome to episode 60 of this shit works. I'm your host, Julie Brown. And today I am discussing how the people we meet. We'll change our lives. This episode is sponsored by Nickerson. A full service, marketing branding, PR and communications agency with team members in Boston, bus, Angeles, Miami and New York city. Visit them@nickersoncos.com. On a cold January night in 2001. My girlfriend, Holly and I stumbled into a bar on Newbury street in Boston. I wasn't looking for anything or anyone. I was only interested in a night out with my roommate. When it was my time to get the drinks I weaved my way through tightly packed patrons. When I got to the bar, the only way for my five foot, two body to get the bartender's attention was to push through two men one was sitting on a stool. And the other was standing beside his stool. Are you using the stool? I asked the man who was standing and it wasn't really a question since before he could reply. I said, not anymore. And sat down the guy sitting on the other store started laughing. This is how I met my husband. A man who for the first 24 years of my life had been a complete stranger. But in the years after that moment would become my best friend, my person, my soulmate. There are over 7 billion people in this world. We are in a constant state of meeting people and creating new relationships, especially in business and as entrepreneurs. What I want you to understand is that the people you meet, even in networking situations, or maybe especially in networking situations will change your life in your career. Some of the changes these people will make will be intentional and some will be done unknowingly. We are taught as children to never talk to strangers. And I do believe that even as adults, we carry a bit of this wariness about talking to people we don't know with us. And I think it holds us back and we, we might not even realize. If everyone I love is a stranger to someone else, and I want to meet the stranger to me that someone else loves. And I want to teach you how to talk to strangers because I guarantee that if you start making it a practice to talk to people, you don't know, one of those people will change your life. Honestly, there are just way too many stories about how the people I've met and yes, mostly through networking have changed my life. How my friend and member of my top five, Tracy convinced me to rescue a dog. And how that dog literally changed my life. Or the story you already know about the strategic email that connected me to my friend, Shannon, why then traveled to South Africa with, and how strapped to each other's bodies. We jumped off the Victoria falls bridge. Or my friends, Jeff and Sue, who I met similarly to my husband. In a bar, they became my best friends and also taught me how to ski at the tender age of 40. My friend, Jackie and other top five, who constantly pushes me to new Heights. Including pushing me to start this podcast. Terry, SPCO another result of a strategic introduction through which I met Kate Hanley, who guided me through writing my first book. There are so many stories like this. I could write a book about these kinds of stories. I can honestly say that every year, at least one of the new people I meet changes my life. This is why you need to believe that other people can enhance your life and change it for the better. This is why you need to talk to strangers. So without further ado, I give you some tips on how to talk to strangers. The first tip is to just be open to meeting new people. Without that willingness, nothing will happen. So that's your number one tip. The second tip is to make the first move. If I hadn't taken that Barstool and sat down next to Chris, I never would have met him. And my life would be a completely different story. If I hadn't talked to Jeff and Sue at that bar, they never would have become my best friends. And I wouldn't have gone on the adventures together. We have. Make the first move. Sit at a bar and talk to the person next to you. Talk to a person in the line at the grocery store. Talk to your neighbors. When someone introduces you to someone you don't know, take the initiative to respond and to meet that person. Do you remember my conversation with Dr. Marissa Franco? How she said that the average adult hasn't made a new friend in more than five years. Part of the reason. It is because we don't initiate conversations with new people. In his book, shaping the dream. Israel more. I abor. Said every friend was once a stranger. And if you know this, you have to understand that conversations are the beginning of connection. Just take the initiative to begin the conversation. Tip number three is to be curious. Human beings are nothing. If not fascinating, have a desire to learn about people and discover new things. Learn how to ask great questions and then really fine tune your ability to listen. You learn so much about people. If you listen to them. Tip number four is to remember, to nurture this relationship over time. Invest in it. And don't take it for granted. And my final tip. Is that if the people you meet will change your life. Believe in your ability to change someone else's life as well. Be the stranger. Someone else is so glad they met. Never underestimate the power of hello or aware that symbol word will take you. I scoured the internet to find an appropriately named drink that I would actually want to try. And I found the winner in a cocktail called the beautiful stranger. Here's what you're going to need. One ounce of ginger liquor. One ounce of Chaka, which is a Brazilian spirit, which I've been fond on for a very long time. Um, if you don't know, it's spelled C a C H a C a. One ounce, fresh lime juice and half ounce of either honey syrup. So simple syrup made with honey or just simple syrup. Shake all of the ingredients, strain it over ice and garnish with a language. Quick announcement on some upcoming speaking engagements. If you're part of the chief executive network and the architectural peer group, I will be the keynote speaker for your upcoming conference next month in October in Orlando. And if you're a part of the crew, the commercial real estate women's network, and you live in coastal Virginia, I will be the keynote speaker for the upcoming November luncheon. Reach out to connect with me in advance. If you were going to be at either of these events. All right friends. This was a really important episode for me. I believe so much in what I talked about. Now it's your turn now it's your turn to go out there and talk to some strangers. Until next week. Cheers.